Just 6 weeks left until my belly decides it's time for a pop! Being my first pregnancy I am no expert of course, but who's to say any of us are so please don't take my blogs in the wrong way. I want to share my experiences as a first timer and mommy to be with everyone and who knows my posts might help or even put other mommas mind at ease.
With only six tiny weeks left till d-day I find myself wondering what kind of mother I will be, what will labour be like, my first reaction to holding my child for the first time, how will I cope as a new mum, will I be good at it,what is my life going to be like? I'm now feeling a huge whirlwind of emotions which I'm sure are perfectly normal at this time, I mean I am bringing a whole new life into this world!
I have so many questions that I would need a thousand booklets to write them down in and I'll probably never get them answered, and if I do the answers will never be right, your parenting is different to my mums parenting and I'm sure mine will vary too and who know if we are right? At the moment I'm just doing what I suppose every other woman does and just goes with it. There are no manuals, no books, it's not a lesson we can take in school. I suppose doing it right is just doing it with love and care.
How can I love someone so much and have not met them yet! It's such a strange feeling to think that the alien movements inside my stomach are actually part of me, I have contributed to the creation of a life! I think we need to all just sit back for a minute and appreciate what an amazing experience life is, how amazing pregnancy and making new life is.....woah!
So I'm 20 years young, and me and the love of my life had a long long discussion one day about starting a family, the idea became real and we started to plan. We both wanted to start a family young, we don't see ourselves with anybody else and why not have a baby when we are both at are healthiest point in life? So 4/5 months of trying for a baby and it was at a photoshoot that I was feeling very strange and my clothing wasn't fitting quite right and I felt very bloated! The photographer said I think you might be pregnant.
Driving home that night me and Shane had talks and it was so very possible that we might be. Home and the test done to our delight we were. I honestly can't explain how happy we both are.
This was planned and I don't think any amount of planning and talking prepares you for the actual event. You don't plan the sleepless nights (before the baby has made an apprehence), the mood changes, the emotional effects on yourself, how you see your body, your relationship the lot! We aren't told that itchiness, increased body tempature, heartburn, sleeplessness, faintness, bleeding gums,rashes and so much more are all a part of pregnancy.
The main things that have gotten me through to the six week mark is Shane and his complete patience, even though we all think every now and again that men are being insensitive but really cut them some slack, there as oblivious to all of this as you are, the difference is it's happening to us and they just hear about it. The second thing is every now and again when I'm hating the way my body looks, or the heartburn has gotten so bad that no amount of gaviscon will helpi it, I feel the kicks of our baby in my stomach and I just think to myself, stop complaining you are about to be someone's whole world, your baby is in your stomach and even though it's causing these things you don't particularly like it will all be worth it when you hold him for the first time, he get his first tooth, his first day at school all these firsts I'm sure one day you will think back to that time you where sitting in bed with heartburn and you felt him kick inside your tummy that it was all worth it.
Putting aside the worries of raising a child and becoming a mother and how we will feel about that and how we are going to do it, I need to express the worries for actually getting the child into this world. We all know the baby didn't get in our bellies by rubbing our nipples together, that part was fun! Up until now I haven't really thought of the evacuation of the baby from the belly part, it's okay to be scared I am terrified. I keep telling myself it's like having a big poo, but really multiply your biggest poo by 5 and I think we will be getting somewhere! So we have had all the fun of the baby making and then the baby baking, I don't think my 5 pregnancy books will prepare me for the moment of the evacuation.
Let's be real here, it's the final count down is playing in my head right now, but you don't just say "open sesame" and the baby just makes it's grand reveal! There is a whole lot of cramping, pushing, drugs, people seeing more of you than you have, and then once you get the baby out, did you know you have to go through that again! I didn't, not until recently anyway.
I don't want to scare anyone, I'd only really be scaring myself! Just think if it was as bad as people tell us it is, then why do people keep doing it!
So breath do a few oohh's and a couple of aahh's, shout at a couple of people and then relax! We can do this, we are built for this very task. I want to say congratulations to every woman who has done this, and good luck to everyone who is about to.
I'll see you on the flip side ladies.
" it's the final count down... Do do dooooo dododododooooo"
